frozen kiss

so another day juz pass by . less than 24 hrs I'm having my pr2 , so worried and nervous ! although it's not graded but it's still major ! JY JY lets do it ! hope to get it done n over with ! be more responsible .. don't try to be a burden can you ? we got so many things in hand , don't have the time to wait for each other , things wund get it done on time .

having limited patient to wait .. get annoyed very easily whn I waited too long .. blahhhhhh , siannnnn .. should juz stop thinking abt it .. everything's over ..
lets end with a kiss .. eternal kiss .
frozen kiss is a song btw ~

re-editing

posted my last post on the way to sch .. after reading it seem like got quite a lot of English error , no wonder got d7 la D: hahaha , paragraphing also badddd. btw it's talking about 2 incident , with the big mouth incident juz happened ytd ? still get on my nerve thinking abt it .. only got to knw her less than a month yet so many things happen .

anyway sch meeting with lek went fine , much better than expected . luckily ._.'' thought lek remark will be there's alot of improvement to be made etc .. but hai hao it went pretty well ~ muz prepare prepare for PR2 alrdy ! >< had a small lunch ? or lunch in sch at the new canteen. food was affordable and nice !

sometime i felt they are just overprotective .. think back .. wasn't angry but they tend to think of the worse situation will happen . partly glad they care so much, another part feel annoyed at times since the wearing isn't tht bad ?

in the mid confusion ahh .. over 12 alrdy .. new post ~

everything has changed

it's finally mid aug ! another 2 weeks I'll be out of hell ! ok .. maybe wasn't as bad as being in hell . there are still certain ppl make the stay a little more tolerance .. so we left 2 weeks before internship come to an end .. fruitful and rewarding experience , learnt so much regardless on work or personal stuff . now should start wrap up our projects , PR2 is on nxt tue ! that's quite fast ! lets hope we can ace it !

never felt so angry for so long .. didn't expect things will turn out this way . it's surprising how dramatic our friendship turn out . I wondered where's the trust u said ? don't play with fire , den who's playing with ? don't get it at all .. it's so funny I trusted u so much , tht y I told u so much . but wht I get in the end ? all those bullshit u warned me ? ridiculous ridiculous ! don't u see that what u said and what u did is exactly the opposite ?!

and I don't get it if it's someone personal life why u such a big mouth went to tell others ? it's none of ur business and u don't even knw that person why go around tell tales of what u heard ? since u r a third party , can't u stop ur big mouth frm spreading any rumors ? feel free to fit in if u think u r the one I'm talking abt . and I think no point trying to explain when there aren't any trust . in the first place I wasn't even given a chance to explain . pardon for my language .

had a short meet up with my darlings last weeks ! it's been sometime the 4 of us meet alrdy ! well spent night with them ! catching up + dinner + shopping ! time seen to past super fast when we got tgt .. forever not enough time catching up ! can't imagine my life without them ! and btw see yao got see my blog ma .. haha , I read ur blog le la !
 just let the feeling fade as time pass ..  everything has changed .

life's full of up and down

things doesn't always go according to what we plan .. so many unpredictable incident . for example, was pretty fine tdy , nt sure wht happen .. become enemy alrdy ? didn't even had a chance to explain , den sentence to death alrdy . isn't quite unfair ? I didn't even knw what's wrong . avoiding doesn't solve any issues right ? at least at my point of view .. it's better to talk face to face at least we knw whether if it's a misunderstanding .

wasn't in the best mood of my life for these few days , have been thinking alot .. upset and disappointment are the only 2 words that cn described how I felt for the past few days .. didn't expect things to turn out this way .. where's the promise u once said ? gone ? if you can't keep ur promise , why in the first place u wan to make the promised ?

lets focus of what I have nw , rather than what I have lost .. there might be ppl that are in a much worse situation as compare to me .. hence I shld focus what I have nw . 知足常乐！have a bunch of crazyy BFF supporting me , so I'm gonna get through it ! thankful tht they appear in my life , without them I might not able to get to where am I nw . I'm sure I'm gonna cherish them !! too in love with them alrdy ! plus my family as well .. although they don't show , but I still feel their overflowing love . hahaha , it's true . they are always there for me , and I'm so gladddddd (: met pei pei for a short meet up ytd ! miss working with her ! plus I finally meet my darlings tdy for dinner .. omq , totally went crazy with them ! time always pass so fast when we r tgt ! nvr enough for us ! looking forward to the nxt meeting with them !!

if he choose to believe them , so be it .. wasn't fated to be friend I guess ? if he doesn't trust me , den we aren't friend . what's friendship without trust ?

我的幸福在那里？

gosh .. totally annoyed by blogger . was blogging halfway , crash .. all my stuff gone . damn .. need to type again .

juz spoilt my mood .. adding on to my Monday blues ! still have 4 weeks and 4 days before intern end ! finally my suffering gonna end !! soon enough to make me happy . internship isn't tht bad , but isn't smt I enjoy or wan to do . prefer my books and exam I guess ? my grade show everything . did fair better in other module without project . hoping friday will come quickly , everyone loves weekend right ! it also a day I cn spent time with my family and work at c&k too .

ytd went shopping with my family . and what we shop ? all food .. hahaha , we r one big pig family !! oink oink ! love eating !! but den also went to search for keyboard for my bro , he started to learn piano . very keen in learning instrument as well , bt my age shld be too old for it alrdy I guess ?

I guess bad habit hard to die .. I did it again .. damn .. huien ahh huien !! quit for a few months alrdy .. why I strt again ! am I too lonely !? hmm .. *thinking thinking* errm .. I don't think so .. well , at least it's smt tht nobody knows .. if anyone know , I might as well kill myself for it . total embraressment . lol .. when I'm free , I tend to think alot . my mind juz can't stop thinking ..


爱你
想幸福的人
nice songs , part of my feeling .

every moment is so precious .

didn't work for 3 weeks , when I'm back . Leo got transfer out .. to wisma . missing him so much TT nw nobody will help me get the bags tht are higher shelve . nobody gonna 斗嘴 with me , making fun whn I'm serving the customers . gonna miss him so much ... haiz ! so I guess nobody gonna transfer for nw .. Michelle n Leo did , so ..

in return of Leo transferring out , Tan got transfer to nex .. still not close with him , not sure what kind of colleague he is .. but overall I guess he's very kind , helping us pack shoes :3 and also pei left gc , which is a gd thing , nw she's going for another job . (: let's wish her luck . haha

so broke for this month .. no extra cash for me to spent .. cn prepare to eat grass alrdy . totally got annoyed by my mom .. maybe tht few bucks doesn't matter to you . but u have to rmb , nw I don't get any allowance frm dad , how many I gonna survive with so little cash . I knw u r concern with my acne problem , but den pls be more reasonable ..

dk why at time I just think abt the things regarding .. especially when I'm bored .. totally wtf , coz ya lor . what to expect ! annoyed annoyed .. if only I cn rewind the time , I wan to strt everything afresh . I wan to have a different ending . an ending I want .

surprisingly .

didn't expect he would do such thing .. found out by accident , it's so shocking and funny at the same time . I thought only those ppl tht r older will go for it , but den .. below 30 ehh , quite young for this ahh .. oops ! part of me can't accept the fact he did it , but after some thought its his pl .. well , I wish him luck I guess ? and also been missing him much as well , didn't contact for days alrdy ..

felt better after talking to someone abt it . although it didn't solve any problem , bt always felt better after talking to someone . if only I'm still have time with my BFF , could have juz told them everything . they are so busy with sch etc .. hope bin cn pull through , and stay happy . life always have up n down right ? I'm sure you will feel better in no time . loveya .

paranoid

i hope i'm thinking too much.. i just can't stop thinking if people is hating me or angry at me, i'm not sure i'm too sensitive or what. the fact is i really don't have high self-esteem, so i'm always thinking people judge me by my looks etc. people really do, just that we wouldn't know.

not trying to be emo to be attention seeker, but the fact is does anyone know how i really feel ? i treasure every single relationship (not the bgr) , i take it to heart what ever had bee said. not xiao qi, but den i care too much i guess.  i'm a person that i need u to tell me u love me everyday, because i'm insecure .. i don't think i'm important to anyone..

always laughing doesn't mean i'm happy . it's really just a mask i need to wear, because nobody knows how it really feel like to be me , huien. if someone asked are you ok ? it's always fine, why? because i'm not sure how to answer if there's anything wrong. i'm sorry being me.

feeling didn't fade

not sure what I wan .. the feeling just doesn't fade like I expected it shld be .. but then it's impossible for him to like me , I'm juz a xmm like what he say . I'm neither pretty or smart .. nothing make me special , other than my pimple face . haiz , why oh why ? :( got such a bad skin .. don't feel like updating much , shall update soon . bye ~

wanting you so much .

really missing you so much . wanting you so much as well . but I'm sure it's impossible . oh well ..

mixed feeling

it's mid june alrdy ! time pass so fast ! half way through my MP/SIP .. isn't a very enjoyable being there for internship, many things happened. well, i couldn't say it's totally not my fault for some of the incidents. but mostly wasn't due to me. it's quite stressful to be out of society working, seen and experience partly of it. wasn't as fun and easy as we thought. and sadly i'm losing the determination and motivation for my mp, i just hope i can buck up and work harder to archive what i wan.

made quite a lot of new friends and colleagues in my current intern company, there are 'good' and 'bad' people u will meet. i wonder what will be like in the 1st company i'm gonna to join. hope it's a better one. hehe. got the knw 2 crazy pretty ladies , always nvr fail to make me laugh everyday. that will be rachel and zoe , and there's more. at least they made my stay there more enjoyable, gonna miss them real bad when i leave.

talking about leaving, michelle(Charles and Keith) left. got transfer to AP, nxt will be leo. not sure where he's gonna be transfer to, bt definitely gonna miss him so badly. he teaches me a lot of things and also make my days working at charles and keith more fun than usual. he's one of the best colleagues in charles and keith. and my contract is ending soon, not sure shld i continue working since the uniform look damn ugly and big for me. plus so many ppl is transferring out, need to adapt to new staff at nex.

supposedly i have so many activities for tmr, however due to the haze so many thing cancel. and some things crop up as well. so i think tmr might be a stay home sat. can save money for fri k, hehe. have been a very good girl this week, came bck home for dinner everyday, keke, another way to save money as well ~ plus there's not a need to think what to eat. zoe brought a ukelele for her bro, and it's juz 28 dollars. tempting to buy, but i have no idea how to play, so might be a waste of money.


i'm so confused about how i feel towards you.. is it like or i juz like ur present there ? at times i'll miss about u, but the more i think about u and me, my conclusion is no way. there isn't a way out for us. and also i'm curious about how u feel toward me, but i'm worried that i got the answer i don't wan to hear. i also don't wan to lose a friend like you. i miss you.. 

new start

haven't been blogging for a few months already . first post for 2013 . nth much to update , juz that i'm pretty busy with work and school , but i have fun with it . hehe , shall update more on the nxt post .

things will get better .

fragile

almost pass 2 months since i posted . shall post a short one before i continue to study for my paper. another 2 days i will be officially free frm exam . didn't expect this sem to pass so fast , in a blink of eye , i'm having my 2.1 exam . just hope i cn achieve a better result as compare to last sem .

recently, many things happen . i heard a lot of deaths arnd me , it's sad to knw tht . my friends' mom pass away frm cancer . i guess you can say her mom is a warrior, she fought well and she nvr once give up . RIP auntie . and also heard someone frm TP also pass away few days ago . i may not knw you, but i heard u r a great guy , rest in peace Issac. these make me realize tht life is so fragile. don't take things for granted because you nvr knw wht is gonna happen nxt moment.

Dear Sherralyn, 
i'm not sure if u r gonna see this post or not. i have been to ur mom wake, u look/sound okay, but i knw deep inside u aren't . i knw it's not gonna be easy to let go. time heals the wound. u said u r prepared for the worse, but nobody will ever be prepare to lost the one they love , especially is someone tht is so special to u . ur mom . i'm so glad to see u trying so hard to be strong, in fact not only glad but also with proud. if i'm in ur shoes, i cn nvr be like you , trying so hard to be normal. if ever someone tht is close to me pass on , part of me die with them . so baby stay strong k ? i'm always here for u , i'm not good at words , i'm good in listening. u aren't gonna fight this war alone , but with me . (:

fulfilling days

it's been long since i posted agn , ever since after the sch break i'm so busy with assignment and camps . well, i only cn blame myself for doing it during the 2 week break , procrastinating . for the two weeks break i either go to sch for meeting and meet yao,bin n teng (: been so long since i met them , totally miss them like hell , so glad to meet them .

29-30th june was the bizen camp, and i'm so happy tht it was a success ! seem like all the freshies tht came was enjoying (: glad tht the effort the main com put in was paid off (: however, since it was our first camp as the organizer and heads of the dept, there is a lot part tht we need to improve on . i'm glad tht i'm working with cally, she really done a great job coz partly she is programmer for FO . thanks for guiding ! not only tht, bizen freshie camp is the first camp tht i didn't sleep at all . hehe , proud of myself (: well, there is more to come , hope i cn do better !

simple life looks great .

haven't been on blogger for quite a few months alrdy , guess i'm too lazy and busy to do so . it's week 4 since since reopen . all the modules i'm taking nw are way too hard as compare to last year , i shld really strt to study . well , i can say life in sch nw isn't tht relax after the holidays . planning and preparing for events and camps , assignments n project due dates are getting near , quizzes as well . at least i am having a fulfilling sch days ? so many things happen too during these few weeks . realize that thr r many times u can't trust ppl arnd u , u don't knw wht is their motive of getting near you . can't judge someone by its cover . quantity of friends , quality of friends . which one u prefer ? most ppl tend to go for quantity , they hope to be popular , but u do have a price to pay . the higher u climb , the higher u fall , you'll be hurt all over and tht is the price u have to pay . being ordinary is fine , at least u r happy .

i need a break

i'm tired of everything , it's time to have a break .

sometime simple is beautiful as well

been a month plus since i last posted . that was way before my main exam i guess ? i'm done with my year 1 and i'm having my holidays now . tomorrow would be the result day , well i hope my GPA would be arnd 3 , i don't expect to do so well this sem . kinda guilty of playing too much this semester . have to work extra harder on next semester to get a better result . didn't expect myself to get into main com , bt still kinda happy though . and i'm going kukup trip with the incoming and outgoing main com , i'm sure it would be a fun trip , it's on the 16th-17th mar .

life have been good ?

it's been long since i posted , hardly have the time and mood to do so . have a busy schedule for this 2 weeks , since the due date for project and assignment are arnd the corner. nxt will be the main exam . shld really strt studying , stop procrastinating !!

it's 2012

so times really fly, it's 2012 . sch have officially strted, results are back. i didn't do well, was expected thr'll be a drop in my result, bt i didn't except to be a huge drop . shld really buck up and pull my grades up . it's important for my GPA .

jealousy ? maybe ...

since age i posted , 12 days ago . meet up with my girls for a zoo trip tdy ! have awesome tym getting crazy with them . teng and me were acting like kiddy , crzy girls ! feeling guilty for nt getting the girl x'mas present tdy :/ shall get it soon , bt i'm so busy with works and house-chores , didn't even have much tym with my hw . shall really get strted , another few days sch gonna strt alrdy .

cherish every moment

finally sch's out nw , test are over . holidays strt . the test wasn't very hard , except tht Qmethod was quite tricky . do hope i can ace it . kinda regret joining so many activities , cause i don't have tym for my dears ! having camp , outing and packing day . wow ! and i have econ , Qmethod and system & concept tool project due whn sch strt . not forgetting the individual computer programming major project . oh well , busy schedule i have .

what's the matter ?

what am i doing ? i don't have the courage like i do in the past . what should i do ?

is there a way out ?

it's week 4 of sch. i have been procrisinating ... it a bad sign . how am i going to improve my study ? to be honest , sch sux . lecturer and tutor have change , somehow the enviroment changed . therefore , feeling kinda drain frm studying .

life in class isn't making any easy for me . the girls still do their gossipping , outcasting etc etc ... however , at least me n sherrayln is still friend , we still cn be each other listening ear . have been attending lecture with zhi ling too (: a friend i made during ESC camp ^^ she's a nice friend.
although life wasn't tht imperfect , however i still hope that i can change class . haven't been meeting idk-ers too , kinda miss them so much . hope to meet up soon (:

family have been quite peaceful these few weeks (: it's a great sign . love my family , especially my parents ! i really cherish them , although they may be nagging n unreasionable at times . hehe , daddy n mommy i love you ! (:

hope to find you soon .

keep on hoping

it's not easy to let go , be it hate or love.

holiday is ending , another 10 days. thinking of going bck sch make me feel so drain . the thinking of facing them make me feel so annoyed , upset , drain , etc etc ... anyway , i juz hate going sch , cause i have to face them .it's gonna be another two and a half year . muz endure !

anyway , i spent my holiday quite well i guess ? had been working as a promoter and admin . so earn quite a few bucks tht cn last me for a few months , and it's a long holiday agn . have to work agn . not forgetting to mention tht i went for esc camp . it was awesome ! made quite a few friends during the camp (: and i change my hairstyle . guess kinda cute ? lots of ppl say tht :x hmm ... couldn't say tht my life during holidays was perfertly awesome , cause thr're hip-cup here and thr . however , i do enjoy my holidays .

tdy , my parents sending my maid bck to the agency cause her working attitidue wasn't very gd , and need to wait for a month or smt for another new one . oh god , the housechore :x :x i don't wan to do la D: hope she'll find another better working enviroment , and hope we cn get a better maid ?

i can't let it go , be it hate or love .

panic ...

two more day will be first paper ! so fast ... :X moodswing ....

give me a hug , tht's all i need

a weeks before exam ... shld strt studying real soon . i guess tmr will be a better day .

give me a hug to let me knw u r beside me, lend me a shoulder to cry , give me a kiss to tell me u love me .

so tired of everything , i need a break .

what's wrong ?

another two weeks before holiday strt . shld really strt revising . kinda shock whn I gt bck my INPROSYS quiz , was thinking tht I'll fail badly bt manage to score pretty well . oh well , happy go lucky I guess ? sch wasn't bad as well , at least I survive through . didn't meeting up bin n Yao this week , they're busy :/ last project , and it'll be finish for this sem .


if only I'm able to find you , I wouldn't be here crying .

too complicated , too sad to know who's ur true friends .

didn't update for quite a few weeks alrdy . anyway , life in sch wasn't that bad since i joined another clique . although thr're tym being left out , but still it's getting better . had 4 quizzes this week , which's alrdy over . another 3 weeks before holiday strt . as usual , ytd meet up with bin , yao didn't manage to come . had awesome tym catching up with bin (: going out with my lovely nvr fail to brighten my day (:


sometime i just hope tht everything can come to a stop . too complicated , too sad to knw who's your real friends .